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Skip navigation! Story from Living. Nina Miyashita. Last Updated 16 March When I went on my first-ever date with a womanI was pretty sure the intention had been clear from the outset. It had all gone as typically date-like as it could have during the planning phase. But as we sat there, a couple of beers behind us and with no definitive mood having been set, I found that one anxiety-inducing question dating still ultimately hanging in the air — is this a date, or are hanging just hanging out?
This wasn't the only time I faced this dilemma in my single days. Another date Dating went on had an obviously platonic vibe, even though we had met on a dating app. It's also entirely possible that relationships between two people who are really good friends can look remarkably similar to those between lovers — the https://telegram-web.online/bosie-craigslist.php that we so often doubt ourselves in social interactions can confuse things even more.
It turns out, my experience is actually quite common.
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Erica notes that, in her experience, women in female friendships can often be quite physically affectionate and comfortable showing friends their bodies, and this often made slight touches of the hand and a caress of the cheek from these maybe-dates pretty confusing.
The most obvious solution to this problem is to ask your maybe-date outright — I ended up doing that on a few of my "dates" and it usually yielded the desired outcome though not always, out then it was really awkward. But it was anxiety-inducing to the point hanging nausea, and I often had to have a few drinks before bringing the topic up, which is not ideal. Many queer people grow up experiencing discrimination or being told there is something wrong with them, or feeling different from their friends and family.
When we experience this enough, it can become how we view ourselves, which means we might not see ourselves as worthy of love. Cheers explains that first-timer queer dating can be just as we often predict rejection before it happens. Of course, this dilemma exists in straight dating too, and can sometimes even be exacerbated by the different ways men and women flirt — we all read into the tiniest things that we want to be true, and way too often, we can be on completely different pages to the people we date without even knowing it.
And as awkward and potentially heart-breaking as it can be for a date to not turn out the way you hoped, being on the other side can be equally horrible.
Is It A Date Or Are We Just Hanging Out?
At the end are the meal, Hannah's suspicions were confirmed when her friend attempted to foot the click to see more bill and hold her hand at the same time.
So, how do we go about preparing and thinking about a maybe-date, maybe-hangout if we're uncertain about what the other person is thinking? If you're more interested in hanging out with are than dating someone, and there's even the slightest shadow of doubt about the intentions, be upfront and clarify with the other person before you've even gone out — or at least as soon as you've noticed just 'vibes'.
Maybe we could've laughed it off! And for those who are attempting to navigate queer dating and are finding it hard to interpret signals, Cheers' advice is to focus as much as you can on yourself and your own enjoyment.
This can lead us to put a huge amount of pressure on a date as if this could be your only chance to find a 'soulmate'. And remember, yes there are plenty more fish in the sea, but also, you don't need all the fish to know [that] you're amazing! Warning: The following includes descriptions of rape, sexual assault and abuse that some readers may find distressing.
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