Dating is undoubtedly one of the most tantalizing pursuits of the college experience.
Dating in college: the problem with Tinder for the somewhat-wholesome
Along with this brazen culture comes the ubiquity of college hookup culture for be it just for the night, or even a casual relationship. Last month, I had one of my most confusing Tinder interactions ever. Yes, Tinder. Students not the best place for someone with my intentions of dating. Alas, the pursuit endures. It started amicably — she asked if I was Jewish, a conversation starter that felt so far out of left-field that it left me taken aback.
She was cute and mature i. I pictured us on our first date: a hike at a local nature preserve, complete with a cup of tea. Maybe I even cook her dinner after with my limited chef skills. So I joked about my background and my interests instead, hoping to create some for banter. Ahh, how we love witty banter.
The short conversation got me excited for the prospect of something developing. That afternoon, she double-texted me, asking for my Snap. Maybe even stuck on the prospect of something developing. I give her my Instagram instead, to which she responds:. The response rang in my ears. And what is she gonna do with them? What started with a dating daydream of going on 100 free dating sites without payment hike ended up dating someone just asking for nudes.
Oh, how things take a turn…. Do with that information as you will. The reality is — in the end — for a second, I thought about playing the game. A short-term illusion for what I really want. Clock ticking. Would I respond? What would I respond? And as I sat there, she unmatches from me, leaving me lost, angry and confused, my dignity stolen from me. So the more your peers seek hookups, the more likely you are to seek them as well. It might seem obvious, but Tinder has no incentive for our dating success.
Their business is reliant on our active, addictive behaviors. What does that mean for us? That, ultimately, their job is not to create matches, but — like other social media platforms — to encourage and create a dependency on the platform and even prevent us from successful matching. Platforms like Tinder seemingly serve an outlet for those with high motivation for romantic encounters, and Tinder perpetuates that need. College brings studies, co-curriculars and socialization; who has time for a relationship anyways?
Nonetheless, we still participate in christina schwarzenegger dating history pursuit. Back to my experiences, though. Students break rolls around and my students tells me that she thinks I should just delete the dating apps for the week.
The pursuit is an individual process that requires a healthy level of self-awareness and perhaps an equal amount of trial-and-error. My peers and I talk about how organic connection i. So, I recently decided to take a break from dating apps, to delete them temporarily in for their glory: all of the swiping, pick-up lines and fleeting conversations.
This time, I met my match in person. No cheesy pick-up line. No immediate requests for pics.
Tips for staying safe on dating apps
And it feels good. Isaac Mintz is a Senior Podcast Editor and can be reached at imintz umich. Skip to content Dating » Opinion » Dating in college: the problem with Tinder for the somewhat-wholesome.
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