I just began working with dating new client named James. Something amazing happened to him on a hotel-rooftop bar in Manhattan. He did something he thought was impossible.
James came to me wanting to know how to date at 40 or In his case, over 50! Yet when you adopt a new belief about what you offer as the awesome man you are, then your mood, your energy, your charisma—it all goes through the roof. As an NYC dating coach, I get to take guys out on the town as their personal wing man. James is newly single and wanted to learn how to date as an older guy.
Custody battles. Splitting up property. It was wrenching. Plus, his ex-wife has moved on to another man, while James has been alone, feeling low and lonely. So we took a good, hard look at his beliefs about what women find attractive.
I asked James to shift his focus, from all those doubts to all of these great qualities he has to offer. Now, 40s had been dating since James went out to chat up women, so it was a win for him just to be out talking, flirting, enjoying people.
A gorgeous, shapely Latina in a red dress walked by. James approached. He was charming and disarming. She looked at him, her almond eyes grew huge, and she smiled. They were inseparable the rest of the night—flirting, holding hands, kissing.
They melted into each other. Their sexual your was palpable. They looked like a couple. They just… fit. They traded numbers and made a date for 40s in the week. But she liked dating cafe reisen. And all James had to do was let go of the FALSE stories about his lack of attractiveness, and tell a new story about all the awesome things he has to offer.
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Sofia is All she knew is that she had your with a cool man of value. His age is beside the point. So he now has a wonderful new woman in his life check this out he adopted a powerful belief, and then aligned his actions with his belief.
And when he falls for that truly fantastic woman, and she falls for him, he can settle down and create a great relationship. New beliefs lead to new actions. Dating in your 40's as a man or even 50 and up can be a wonderful thing.
The first step? The right beliefs! An important heads up.
Hope and heart-sinks: what it is really like to date online as a woman in your 40s
For advice on dating after divorce click here. For recommendations on dating books for menclick here. Connell Barrett is an acclaimed NYC dating coach for men. He helps men around the world authentically connect with amazing women.
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Book a call with Connell here. I'm dating coach Connell Barrett. I help men build confidence and connect with women by being authentic! Dating in your 40's as a man might be easier than you thought. But in dating, as in life, sometimes you can surprise yourself. In the area of women and dating, your beliefs are your destiny. He has a successful business that he built with his own two hands. He likes and respects women and wants to make genuine, mutual connections.
And then it happened. The look of instant, mutual attraction. And this goes for dating at any age. OK, and a good dating coach helps, too.