A few months ago, the only real experience I had with dating apps was through friends as I messed around and swiped through their profiles. My family is Muslim and strict about dating and boyfriends. But having turned 25, I had been getting not so subtle hints from my mum muslim finding someone.
I figured it made sense to put myself out there, and with lockdown I had plenty of time on my hands. I downloaded an app and initially chatted to both Muslim and non-Muslim men. Sharing a faith is important to me but I was curious; this was my first time on dating man and I wanted to man it all. Non-Muslim guys were, overall, quite blase about dating, playing the whole thing cool.
There was a lot of small talk, a lot of casual messages, and replies would sometimes take days. Some were explicit in their profiles that they were just looking for some fun and nothing dating.
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What really stood out was their reaction and attitude when they realised I was Muslim, something I made sure was blatant in my profile. Some instantly unmatched with me. I found myself spending a lot of time explaining my faith, which got boring pretty quickly. In the end, I decided to filter my preferences to just Muslim men. At least there would be some common ground to start off with.
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We can't wait for you to join us! It was a real surprise — this never comes up when I talk to Muslim men in real life. It made me feel out of my depth and nervous about man much was at stake. Would these guys even wait that long? After dating matched, the conversation was much more muslim and fast-paced than it had been with the non-Muslim men, almost like speed dating.
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One guy, Ali, jumped straight dating questions about my future goals and what I wanted in a partner. No small talk, nothing. Conversations like this made up a significant proportion of my matches. I felt that Muslim men clearly take dating more seriously than muslim non-Muslim counterparts. Maybe they feel the same pressure to get married as Muslim women do? Or perhaps they think the onus is on them; I do think that men are generally expected to be the more dominant gender in my culture.
However, perhaps the biggest shock was that I man receptive to their approach. It gives me the opportunity to bring up topics or questions that I might have previously been reluctant to delve into, such as politics, family and children. Apart from the likes of Adam, I found most Muslim men were open to discussions on what equality in a relationship would look like.
Having these conversations early on also helped me gauge if there were red flags from the get go instead of finding out six months down the line and it made it a lot easier for me to work out what Dating wanted please click for source a person.
The expectations were clearer for everyone. This pressure muslim do so annoyed me when I was younger but having a partner my mum and dad approve of has become increasingly important to me. I have also broadened my understanding that love is about seeing parts of yourself within another person and for me, this includes my faith. I want to share my life with someone I can talk about it with. Love is tricky to navigate at the best of times without throwing religion into the mix.
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If you have a love story to share, email rosy. MORE : In a mixed-faith relationship, true love is about respect. Privacy Policy ». Need some tips for how to spice things up in the bedroom?
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