On this page:. But 10 years ago, that was called fat. So you grow up insecure, and sad. You hide, you cry, very silently. You are 15, and under the impression that no one wants you and that nobody could ever love you. Do men prefer skinny women? Fast forward to check this out, nearly a decade later, that same body type is praised and desired.

But before we dive deep into this purely societal issue, let dating tell you a little story first. I was out with some of my girlfriends, and we were sitting in a martini bar, really close to the entrance door. We were just talking about work, our nagging mothers, and the occasional average man who would cause us a sleepless night or two. Through ladies door, enters a man, who I would, very humbly, say is universally attractive. He was pretty tall, with black slicked-back hair and a jaw that could cut a watermelon in half. Following him is what seemed to be his girlfriend.

They seemed really cozy, and lovey. You see, a normal person would stop there. A couple just entered a bar, big deal. I should also probably tell you that this girl was a bit larger than her boyfriend, physically. I personally do not care, but my friend seemed to think that was hilarious. Why do guys like chubby girls. But this begs the question, who told my friend the girl HAS to be smaller or slimmer than the guy? Come to think of dating, this web page told that to any of us, as we all seem to have been taught the same, hurtful thing?

Ages ago, in the middle and towards the end of the 16th century, natural curves on both men and women were considered beautiful, and extremely attractive. They alluded to health, fertility, and money — meaning you had enough money to keep up with your diverse and rather filling diet. The very bold and revolutionary strokes of artistry from the Fat period, and all fat way to Baroque, sure have helped promote this idea of beauty through many different channels of art. To be dating was to be ill, in poverty, or on the edge of death itself.

And although the more hollow artistical bunch left a lot of dark pieces before they passed, it was never heavily an influence, dating it was a mere think piece during your regular literature class. We relate fatness dating laziness, fast food, and ugliness. Remember the Kate Moss craze? It was only two decades ago, and every girl wanted to be a size zero because any more meant every less chance at being beautiful. Today, especially in the West, curves are praised the most, and from the looks of it, every other girl is trying her best to fit the narrative one way or another.

In a time when everything should be in fashion, and when we should celebrate our differences rather than force everyone to look the same, we still sure do know how to make girls cry and starve themselves in the name of fat. Who told us, and I mean most of us that this is the standard we should all follow? Do you know the man is the protector, and the woman is the carer trope? The man goes out to dating and the woman waits for his return while caring for the children and house. Even just a couple of decades ago, we had the more commercialized version of exactly that.

But what ladies that ladies to do with being slim or fat? You see, dating then, it was expected for the woman to be the one who is protected, meaning she is incapable of doing so herself, so she needs a man.

A fat and dominant man at that. In this scenario, other than the expectation for her to be this fragile, feminine, and caring creature, she is also expected to look ladies part, not just play it.

And what do we associate femininity, pureness, and innocence with when it comes to women? Outer appearances, of course. When have you seen a movie trope where a handsome ladies strong prince saves a fat or strong woman check this out the dragon? As a matter of fat, when have you seen a strong woman save a scared man from anything, really?

The film industry sure is trying to mask that traditional trope today, by including a lot of diversity in its casting, despite still having a lot of history to erase. Pop culture influences are much stronger than many of us are fat enough to accept. So, of course, when the heavyweight of traditional and media ladies fall onto our backs, we will all try to fit into a narrative that is just fed to us.

Meaning these expectations do originate from someone. Us, just from a long time ago. Recently, I stumbled across an amazing writer by the name of Virgie Tovar, or more accurately, I dating one of her amazing articles that tackle the dating world for fat girls.

And I highly advise giving it a read. She went on, in great detail, how she met this handsome guy who was really into bigger girls. Their sexual energy was amazing, fat she truly felt wanted and craved. But when she asked for more, a coffee date more, and hidden sex fantasies less, he backed out. So…like a trophy? It makes zero sense to me.

It seems like all of our desires are heavily controlled and influenced by our surroundings, which is one of the fundamental issues of how we look at weight, and the people carrying it. We are happy to see more plus-size models, starring actors, and musicians on all of our screens and media outlets.

We are slowly, but steadily showcasing them as beautiful and normal, instead of some laughable fat characters in films, cast only for comedic purposes. We are collectively trying to break standards and set both natural beauty and any kind of beauty in the center. The premise is this: you are not ladies to cover up or alter yourself ladies any way. You are meant to take what you have and allow it to shine through so that the people around you can see and get inspired feature by feature, and beauty by all.

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